kaakaa | (no subject)

it’s okay. I don’t ever assume the worst, usually!! What’s been keeping you busy? And what about you, are you okay?

It's just schoolwork that's all. College sometimes feels like nothing's going on and then other times you don't have time to do anything else. I'm just trying to make the future semesters easier for myself.

But sometimes it's difficult to focus with other stuff on my mind?? So I know I keep opening your contact in my phone only to close it.
Honestly it'd be totally out of place to type out all my thoughts like this. It hasn't been all *that* long since I've talked to you but
It kind of feels like it has?
It's pretty stupid putting it like that when I don't know what I'm even trying to say!

are you trying to tell me you missed me? What is that you’re going to school for anyway…?

Maybe I am. But it wouldn't make much sense would it?? I mean it really hasn't been that long at all. And that just feels like a selfish thing to say.
I've just been spoiled lately by living normally like this.

I know I mentioned it on the app but it's been a while huh???? I can't act like I really talk about that stuff a lot anyway. But I want to work with kids.

sure it makes sense. I miss you too. It’s normal… it’s okay to be selfish, isn’t that what you tell me sometimes?

oh yeah… I really should take you to Martha’s sometime…

Martha's?

Martha... she kind of raised, Yusei, Jack and I, you could say. She takes care of all the orphans. I help out there a lot. You can meet the kids there too.

It sounds like an important place.
One of these days i'd like to go.

Really? She’ll insist on feeding you.

Who would i be to tell her no?? If it means meeting her then I'm okay with it.
I have to be selfish a little.

I think it's easier telling people that than applying that to my own mindset.
I've walked with my head down and repressing my own feelings for most of my life so there's a lot I have to do.

We could plan it soon if you’d like! She’d be happy to have us anytime!!!

I believe in you, though! You can do anything you set your mind to and I want to see… I want to know your feelings and thoughts.

I'm not sure for a concrete day just yet. I don't want something to come up and to have to cancel.

Well I've been selfish enough to keep talking to you. So that counts for something.

That’s fair. We can just drop by for dinner or lunch someday that you’re free.

well, I can keep talking to you forever~ you can be more selfish.

That might just weaken my resolve if I'm even more selfish.

what do you mean?

[ what does resolve mean again… ]

I mean then I'll end up missing you more I guess.

And I’ll still be here.

And that's why I have to maintain my resolve. But I know I can't expect people to wait around for me either.

Nazuna, I’m not going anywhere.

I don't mean literally.

mm, just saying regardless

Isn't there something you want to do with your life?

I don’t know what that has to do with this? :x

People can change is all I'm saying. And that's not a bad thing.

I mean I might have goals but… I guess I just think about you being there still.